no my baby's uglier

i once jokingly told a friend that it was a good thing the mommy hormones kicked in when finn was born, because he wasn't a pretty sight. the baby acne and misshaped features, whoo boy! instead of responding with a laugh or an "oh stop," she said, "well, i bet my baby was uglier." what triggers this in moms? why is it that no matter what the topic of mommyhood there is this extreme competitiveness? the mom guilt and strive to be the best is the worst part about being a mother.

i have decided that God created finn to be my child and mine alone. the choices that i make in raising him are what i feel is the best way for us. however, no matter what decision i make, there is some mother out there that will make me doubt my decision or feel defensive, trying to explain why what i am doing is right. can't we all just be right? there are millions of big and little decisions that we have to choose for our babies. breastfeed or bottle? huggies or pampers? sleep in the crib or share a bed? work out of the house or stay at home? wake up or let sleep? cry it out or pick him up? carrots or peas? change the diaper or let it soak? there are an endless amount of questions that we just instantly have to answer as moms. our worst critic? other moms who may have had a different answer (or had the same, but just want to be difficult). it's taken me almost 8 months to feel comfortable with the fact that i had a c-section, because i've been told i just didn't try hard enough to get finn out. i also feel such an extreme guilt that i want to quit breastfeeding. the main reason i'm still doing it is because of the reaction of other moms. i feel ridiculous.

the purpose of this rant? i've decided to just be over this whole thing. there have been numerous times i have ended a conversation with, "yeah, finn must be slow" or "you're totally right; i'm totally wrong" or "your child is just so much more advanced. wow!" i shouldn't have to, but it tends to be easier. i don't want this to be a your way vs. my way. we should be proud of one another and how hard this motherhood thing is and how each morning we get to wake up and enjoy the person God entrusted us with and how we can sometimes even shower and look presentable before we have to go out in public. this motherhood thing is hard and lonely and i need moms in my life that support whatever i do and however i do it because it works for baby finn.

notes:
1. i am in no way saying that i am not a part of this vicious cycle and have hands down made another mom feel inadequate because her decision is not what i would have done. i am consciously trying to remind myself to shut my stupid mouth and just be wrong for once.
2. my child is the best child that has ever walked the face of this earth, or at least scooted haphazardly across the family room rug.